The US Olympic Committee announced controversial rule changes for a new sport. Athletes are confused, coaches furious, and spectators excited.…
Famous Actress Takes Break, Nation Enters Existential Crisis
Nicole Kidman said she’s taking a break for “personal projects.” America is panicking, unsure how to survive without her red…
Congress Tries to Hack Ransomware, Realizes Ctrl+Alt+Delete Doesn’t Work in Real Life
A new cybersecurity bill aims to protect America from ransomware attacks. Congress hopes to finally outsmart teenage hackers armed with…
Foreign Investors Flee US Stocks: Wall Street Asks, ‘Was It Something We Said?
Foreign investors are ghosting the US stock market like a bad Tinder date. The Fed’s interest rate dance has everyone…
Teen Sprinter Breaks World Record, Leaves Internet Breathless
Tate Taylor sprinted into world-record history, leaving trainers stunned and cameras struggling to keep up. Twitter exploded with “GOAT!” memes,…
Supreme Court to Earth: Good Luck, You’re On Your Own
In a plot twist worthy of a climate disaster movie, the US Supreme Court struck down a key environmental regulation.…
Gas Prices Skyrocket, Americans Begin Googling ‘How to Ride a Goat’
Gasoline prices in the US jumped so high, even Elon Musk briefly considered walking. With inflation fears flaring, Americans are…
NFL Preseason or Hunger Games?
An NFL superstar just blew his knee out—during practice. Fans are worried, coaches are stressed, fantasy leagues are on fire.…
Pop Star Cancels Tour—Millions Cry, Indonesia Googles: ‘Who?’
A global pop icon canceled their tour due to vague “health concerns.” America mourns. Threads, tears, thinkpieces. Meanwhile, Indonesians ask:…
Big Tech, Big Trial, Big Oops
A major social media platform is on trial for data misuse and spreading fake news. Finally! The world is catching…
Silicon Valley or Valley of Sad Goodbyes?
America’s top tech firm just announced another “restructuring”—also known as “mass firing, but make it sound corporate.” Thousands of employees…
Dream Team Defeated? Time to Recruit Players from Cempaka Sports Hall!
The U.S. men’s national basketball team lost in a friendly match? Indonesian netizens are puzzled: “Is this the Dream Team…
Beyond the Stars: Sci-Fi Fantasy, Ticket Price Horror!
Blockbuster Beyond the Stars breaks box office records! Americans are flocking to see it—even if the ticket price equals a…
Free Speech, But Make It Quiet: America’s New Talking Rules
The U.S. House just passed a bill that allegedly protects order—but to Indonesians, it looks more like Suharto’s ghost got…
Interest Rates Up, Wallets Down: Is the Fed Playing Economic Kite-Flying?
In the U.S., the Federal Reserve signals yet another interest rate hike. Why? Because inflation refuses to behave—like chili prices…
America’s Hunger Games: When Avocados Become Black Market Currency
The shelves are empty. The panic is full. Across the United States, Americans are experiencing something once thought impossible: walking…
TRUMP: “USA is not your military Piggy Bank!” – NATO on the verge of a breakup tour
In yet another installment of The Real World: White House Edition, President Donald Trump has reportedly threatened to yank the…
America Drafts AI Therapists: National Mental Health Crisis Meets Digital Bootcamp
“Dear diary, today my therapist threatened to delete herself if I skip one more session…” In a nation where anxiety…
Drafted to Ctrl+Alt+Defend: US Launches Keyboard Army Initiative
In a bold shift from boots-on-the-ground to fingers-on-the-keyboard, the US Army has announced its latest recruitment initiative: the Digital Draft.…
240,000 Pages Later: America Tries to Solve Its Own True Crime Puzzle
In an apparent bid to win the Guinness World Record for “Most Documents No One Will Ever Read,” the U.S.…
Delta vs B-52: When the American Skies Become a UFC Cage
Americans were treated to an unexpected episode of “Fast & Furious: Air Combat” this week when a Delta Airlines flight…
U.S. Supply Chain Goes on Strike: Trucks Quit, Planes Sulk, Fuel Laughs All the Way to the Bank
In the land of freedom and fries, the only thing running now is… out of fuel. Jet fuel, diesel, and…
Mosquito Madness: America Declares War on Bugs, But Bugs Don’t Care
In a summer plot twist nobody asked for, the U.S. government has declared a health emergency over a spike in…
Tariff Tantrum: Europe and Mexico Clap Back at Uncle Sam’s Trade War
Europe and Mexico just dropped the mic: in response to U.S. trade aggression, retaliatory tariffs are in full swing. American…
ICE Maybe: America Accidentally Deports Itself
In a dramatic plot twist worthy of a soap opera, ICE detained American citizens, mistaking them for undocumented immigrants. The…
ICE Detains U.S. Citizens for Looking Too Un-United
ICE officers are under fire after allegedly detaining American citizens who looked “suspiciously non-default.” One man claims he was stopped…
Trump Slaps Tariffs, Markets Slip on Banana Peel: EU and Mexico Grab Their Frying Pans
On a sweltering July day, Donald Trump decided it was time to turn up the heat on international trade—literally. With…
FEMA Plans to Cut Red Tape: Disaster Victims Shocked They Might Get Help Before Retirement
Good news for disaster survivors in America: FEMA finally realized that filling 200 pages of forms while sitting on a…
Trump’s 30% Tariff: Europe Screams, Mexico Laughs, US Farmers Sweat
In his latest episode of Make Tariffs Great Again, Donald Trump proudly slapped a 30% tariff on almost everything that…
Texas Floods Outsmart FEMA: Maps Lost, Water Didn’t Get the Memo
If you thought water only flows downhill, think again — in Texas, it goes wherever it pleases. The flash floods…